Bonjour! Howdy? Nice to know you’re safe and sound.
Conversationalism, hmmm, I don’t think that’s a word or is it?
Anyways today, I just want to talk about conversation techniques, how to chat, how to talk and reply the person(s) you’re engaged in conversations with. How to be a good conversationalist (that’s a word, I’m sure of it this time 😉).
A few weeks back we talked about listening – if you haven’t, please check it out, it’s dope – and most of the Ideas I wrote down were insights I got from Dale Carnegie and Stephen Covey.
Now ‘let’s talk about talking’.
I’m not always a good conversationalist.
I lack some of these conversational techniques. And I don’t usually like talking.
Sometimes I like talking – depends on my audience though and my mood.
Sometimes when I talk I don’t convey the whole thing from my mind properly. I guess that’s one of the reasons I started this blog “Jeff talk” (full name should be Jeff talks about stuff properly from his mind this time. LOL).
Let me start by stating some principles from how to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie
Dale Carnegie says:
- Don’t criticize or condemn people and their Ideas or stance or beliefs.
I saw this picture a while back where 9 was written on the floor, the person standing facing the number saw “9” while the other person standing opposite saw “6”
Just because you’re right doesn’t “always” mean I’m wrong. You haven’t seen life from my side. Be open-minded.
I have a lot more to say, but let me keep it short for the sake of this blog post length. Maybe in my next post on conversationalism I’ll expand on this.
2. Be genuinely interested in other people. Ask them questions about themselves more often because you want to care and know. Make it a rare thing to talk about yourself unless asked.
3. Mention his/her name often in conversations
4. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
There’s this story of a mechanic who was outstanding and fast in his work but now became average, he ain’t thorough and he’s slow. A friend reminded him of his past feats. This friend also spoke his mind (telling him he wasn’t happy), he also suggested they find the solution together.
Funny thing is he might not even realize he’s been slacking.
The average person can be led readily if you have his or her respect and if you show you respect that person for some kind of ability.
There’s more to say but let’s stop here and digest this…to be continued
Finally, let’s take more insight from the best book ever written;
The Bible says in Proverbs 18 Vs 19… arguments separate friends
Prov.18.19 – It’s harder to make amends with an offended friend than to capture a fortified city. Arguments separate friends like a gate locked with iron bars.
Prov.18.20 – Words satisfy the soul as food satisfies the stomach; the right words on a person’s lips bring satisfaction.
Prov.18.21 – Those who love to talk will experience the consequences, for the tongue can kill or nourish life.
I really wish to improve my relationships with everyone, especially the people I value in my life. I wish to be a good conversationalist, listener and effective person (friend). It’s one of my prayers and quest for 2021.
God help me and God help us.
Till next time folks